


loose enough to breath? fine.

by QueenieRose53001



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety, Depression, M/M, Mentions Of Blurryface, Not as dark as the tags make it seem, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, ahh i love high school aus, blurryface can actually fight me, josh is anxious, tyler plays basketball and writes poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 09:05:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,042
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11010288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenieRose53001/pseuds/QueenieRose53001
Summary: Tyler tries to help out his best friend.





	loose enough to breath? fine.

“You know, I could help you out with the whole anxiety thing,” Tyler said as he passed Josh in the hallway. It was crowded, and Josh was fighting his way up the hallway to get to the last class of the day, precalc, one of the many classes Josh was worried about failing, despite his straight As. His head jerked up when Tyler grabbed his arm. “Meet me at the park across the street at three, if you want.”

Josh nodded, struggling to get to class. He had been having a relatively good day, until Tyler mentioned the anxiety. Now, the shaky feeling in his stomach was no longer on the back burner. 

Josh liked Tyler, Tyler was so cool, he wrote such brilliant poetry, and Tyler was on the varsity basketball team. Tyler was the first kid in their grade to come out as gay, and the first kid to make varsity as a freshman and stay on through junior year.

Tyler was friends with an anxious, mostly closeted, jumpy, pessimistic loser like Josh. He always had wondered why Tyler would take on such a charity case like himself, but he could never bring himself to ask.

Besides, Josh always found himself blushing and stammering around pretty boys like Tyler.

Josh scrambled into the classroom, nearly dropping his binders. Taking his seat at the back of the mostly full classroom the moment the bell rang, Josh fiddled with the ends of his hair. He pulled at the curly dark hair and willed the clock to move faster. His teacher droned on and on, and Josh couldn’t focus. He was too distracted thinking about what Tyler was going to tell him in the park.

Josh knew that Tyler had anxiety too, but he seemed to have it under control, most likely because Tyler had confided in him that he took antidepressants, but those had been prescribed for depression, not anxiety. Josh’s own anxiety was bubbling, his hands shaky as he tried to take notes. Was Tyler going to slip him some of his own antidepressants? Probably not, as those took several weeks until the effects took place.

The final bell rang, and Josh was quick to pack up his books and leave the school. He put his hoodie on as he rushed out of the building, catching a glimpse of Tyler, pulling on the beanie he wasn’t allowed to wear inside the building. The hat was bright, blood red, and Josh could see it clearly. Josh followed Tyler to the park across the street from the school.

Tyler sat down thirty feet away from the playground, under a gnarled old tree. Tyler leaned up against it, the red of his beanie vibrant against the bark. He was chewing something, probably gum. Josh stood hesitant near him until he patted the ground next to him. “I’m not gonna bite, you know. Come here,” Tyler coaxed.

Josh sat carefully, swinging his bag to the other side, away from Tyler. “How are you going to help me?”

Tyler blew a bubble in his gum, the artificial scent of strawberries strong. Tyler didn’t like mint. The bubble popped with a sharp crack that made Josh flinch. “I came up with this, there’s no guarantee that this will work. I mean, it does for me, and it’s worth it to give it a shot. Right?”

Josh nodded, and Tyler continued. “I kind of just personify my flaws. The self portrait in art? That’s not me, that’s him. My flaws, I don’t know where I end and they begin, that’s why he looks so much like me. Just with red eyes. I call him Blurryface.”

Josh snickered quietly before cutting off suddenly. “It’s just funny that Mr. Way thought it represented self hatred-”

“It’s true. He represents my self hatred, my depression, my anxiety even though it's undiagnosed. He's all the things I hate about myself.”

“Sorry.” Josh looked down at the yellowing grass. Tyler leaned over and put a hand on his shoulder.

“You don’t need to apologize, Josh. It’s okay. Just, create a person, who looks somewhat like you, to represent your flaws. Be as detailed or as vague as you want.” Tyler instructed gently.

Josh ignored Tyler’s incorrect pronunciation of “vague” and did as he told him. He imagined himself, with bright red hair, the color of Tyler’s beanie, with an undercut. Josh had always wanted one, but his mother forbid it. The imagination wore no makeup, just some sort of red paint ringed around the eyes. It was a weird detail for Josh to include, as it had come out of nowhere, but there was no changing it.

“You got your person?” Tyler asked.

“I’ve got him.” Josh said, borrowing some of Tyler’s confidence.  

“Okay. Imagine that you’re standing in front of your flaws. You have complete control of them and what you do.”

“Got it.” Josh imagined the red headed boy standing right in front of him. He smiled softly at himself. The red haired boy smiled back.

“Your flaws try to hurt you, but you have complete control. Tie a noose around your mind.” Tyler said. The red eyes of Tyler’s flaws bugged out, as he scrabbled at the rope constraining his breath. Tyler, the real Tyler, smiled as he watched the light behind his flaws’ eyes sputter out.

Several moments passed before Josh spoke again. “Loose enough to breathe?” Tyler’s eyes flashed open, the image fading away. “I can’t kill him. He’s me.”

Tyler thought for a second. “Fine. Then tie the rope to a tree. Tell them that they belong to you. It’s not a noose, it’s a leash. Tell them they must obey you.” Tyler improvised. Tyler normally didn’t loosen the knot on the noose, never changed the rope’s purpose. He wasn’t trying to control the things in his mind, he wanted them gone, and imagining killing them made them go away, at least temporarily.

Josh opened his eyes. He took a few breaths. “I think that helped. Thank you, Ty.”

“You’re welcome, man. I have to get going, I’ve got basketball practice in fifteen minutes. Oh, and Josh?”

Josh looked up at Tyler’s face as he stood up. “Yeah?”

“You gave me an idea for a new poem.”

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a story a week class, even though I changed the names and genderbent it. Hope you enjoyed!
> 
> Also did y'all see the cameo I slipped in?


End file.
